November 14, 2024

Republicans Puzzled by Mysterious Object on Senate Floor

As Senate Republicans prepare to allow Governor Walz to keep his powers to shutdown the state’s economy and lock people in their homes for another month, many are puzzled by a mysterious object that appeared on the Senate floor overnight. No one knows how it got there, but according to the custodian on duty, it was first witnessed early on Sunday morning.

“I’ve never encountered an object like this before” stated Senate Majority Leader Paul Gazelka. “We’re a little fearful of utilizing it and find it offensive in the Senate chambers”.

The mysterious object was also seen a week ago in the Utah desert.

Minnesota Loonatic Chief Biologist Chas Johanson confirmed early this afternoon that the object is a backbone. As soon as it appeared in the Senate chambers, it disappeared and hasn’t been seen since.